Daniel J. Delph
We were all blessed to know her. We will all miss her. Her compassion, kindness, support, & love were always steadfast. We always knew she cared about all of us. She had a magical, optimistic, nurturing quality I cherished. I became happier, smiled easier, and felt validated from her devotion. I found her acceptance an oasis of warmth and enlightenment in a sea of cold darkness. I was never judged, just loved.
I never felt at home or understood in the community I was raised in. I have conducted an arduous lifelong journey searching for this elusive unknowable thing I considered "Home." I truly didn't know what it was or where it was. I did know I always felt nourished & rejuvenated after visiting Aunt Ruthie for as long as I could. I have always longed for a community of kindred spirits to feel relaxed, content, & at ease. I have always wished for the same strength of bond among my peers I felt with Aunt Ruthie. Her company was a special refuge I rarely enjoyed elsewhere. I was at home near her.
Aunt Ruthie always seemed in good spirits. Even in pain with surgeries, limited agility, arthritis, poor eyesight, & diabetes she never sounded especially depressed. She just had a sweet spirit which uplifted everyone. I'll miss her unmistakable laugh & her heavily Midwestern 'o' I never hear in Kentucky. I still hear her soothing, calm, welcoming voice in my head. In my youth, I found it quite a novelty someone could choose to awaken later in the day. I thought it quite a marvelous advantage to attain this mysterious status "retired" & sleep in every morning.
I swear, I will never open a Sunday paper including a special section for coupons without seeing Aunt Ruthie's smiling face in my memory. I may have been young, but a quarter-century later this picture is indelibly etched in my brain as if Michelangelo carved it there. Aunt Ruthie had the most enormous, overflowing, spectacular, redundant, & complete collection of every coupon on the globe at any given time. Pick any product category, or brand name & she had at least 3 in her vast collection. She collected coupons for products she didn't use, but knew others could.
Whenever her beloved husband Bill watched his favorite show, "The Price is Right," she had an organized, detailed, available reference guide. I always found this particularly fascinating. I asked her once how much all those prices in potential savings added up to. I don't know if she answered to satisfy my curiosity, gauged a rough estimate, or if she ever actually added them all up but she said "around $200 or so." I was mesmerized.
Some negative people have a way of making a person upset, nervous, or fearful just from their presence. My Aunt Ruthie was certainly polar opposite of that. She would light up a room with her gentle smile and open arms eager to welcome all loved ones. My heart restored when her boundless empathy allowed optimism to re-emerge. My faith renewed when my countenance rose to meet hers. My day improved getting to visit her. Everyone's life improved because Aunt Ruthie played a part. I think now of what the Wizard said to the Tin Man, "A heart is not judged by how much you love, but how much you are loved by others."
I felt her hug me over the phone line melting the miles between us. The call will be a much longer distance call from now on, but she will never truly be any further away than our prayers & dreams. She always tried to end the call with saying that she'll call me next time because "we were on my nickel." Now, I'd pay several dozen rolls of nickels to have one more hour to share my life and say goodbye.
I know she's missed Uncle Bill for 15 years now. I imagine it's wrong to ask that I say goodbye to her when she's saying a big joyful "Hello!" to Uncle Bill, Grandpa, Uncle Earl, her parents, and all other loved ones passed. She will never know pain or sorrow ever again.
In her final years her eyesight was worsening until completely gone. Now, she is embraced by the everlasting arms basking in the brightest light of all. God's light has never dimmed and I saw a significant portion of that gracious illumination in her. We all grieve losing her but we were all so blessed to have her in our lives. Now Aunt Ruthie is at home too.
